The Touchless Baby Scrub
I don’t wash my car that often, but when I do, I spring for the touchless kind, the car wash that’s promoted so heavily at all the finest Quickie Marts and other similar establishments that cluster around interstate off-ramps. There are no fancy spindles fastened with sprockets and gears, no heavy industrial brushes that glide across your car’s clear coat like sandpaper over Walnut. I pay extra for that touch of class that only touchless provides. Also absent is the irrational fear that I will be chewed up in the mechanism’s inner workings, but this just might be me. Touchless uses high powered jets of water to vaporize the months of neglect off your car. Nothing touches the car except the water and the detergent. It’s great. This method, however grand, is still not free from my irrational fears. I’m developing one now. If you’ve seen the movie Maximum Overdrive with Emilo Estevez, then, you’ll see where I’m heading with it, but that’s a side note.
I was blessed with the idea of the Touchless Baby Scrub when I was confronted with the possibility of changing my nephew’s diaper. I got out of it but I’ve been plagued with the chasing notion that I won’t be able to dodge that bullet forever. The Touchless Baby Scrub is a Touchless car wash on a much smaller scale. You don’t want to peel the flesh of the child. You just want to knock the nasty off. You stick the baby into the device making sure to remove the dirty diaper. Suspend the baby over the rotating nozzles and close the vinyl curtain. Your hands and the baby are the only things in the device now. This device is designed with the baby’s safety in mind. The baby is safe even under cataclysmic conditions. The Touchless Baby Scrub will be held to the same standards as any other baby product.
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